I don’t believe at all that i will ever find someone who will make me feel the way he did. I don’t want to love anyone again the way i loved him. He was truly my best friend. That is not something you just find again. I will forever feel this loss, the bond was too strong.
It’s funny because about 6 years ago before we were together, i saw a psychic. She knew his name before i even sat down. She told me that he was my soul mate, that i had a connection with this person that i wouldn’t be able to understand. But she also told me we would always come and go out of each others lives, but we would always feel connected. She gave me two little ornaments of these fish – when you put them together they joined to a perfect circle. He had one and i had the other. So far she hasn’t been wrong about any of it, so i have no reason to believe she was lying. Why would she? I did’t pay to see her either.
My intuition does tell me this is true, i do feel in my gut we will be close again one day, and i do feel like i am connected to him in a way i can’t explain to anyone else. But now my head just says run a million miles from him. I am so hurt. If she’s right, then our paths will naturally cross again, destiny will run its course. I will not be a fool and chase after it.